Like all the girls of my time and the place where I was born, it was not surprising for me to be among a family of four sisters and a brother. The household was that of a strict Marwari family, but with loving parents and one of a typical Indian family. Contact with other sex was totally restricted and so were wearing of modern dresses, socializing, and traveling outside. But that doesn’t mean my parents did not love. They could move worlds to keep us safe and comfortable. But then freedom is a luxury, not found in many Indian households. I nurtured dreams of becoming a doctor and serve the needy. But my dreams were shattered when I was married off at a tender age of 20 to a person who was a total stranger (but later proved to be an angel in disguise).
I couldn’t cope up with the new life and by the time realized the vigors of my new life I was blessed with a baby angel. But then it was all new for a girl from the small town that totally cared free, but now bogged down by the burdens of expectations, familial responsibilities and to handle a very strong lady in the form of her mother – in – law. She had a strong head on calm shoulders and even though uneducated she managed the family business. She fascinated me a lot. And then slowly I was moving towards my breaking point and one day I snapped. I tried to commit suicide by gobbling some sleeping pills in the hope of a prolonged peaceful sleep. I was hospitalized and it gave a jolt to my otherwise husband.
The times in hospital were life changing. I got to see another side of my husband. He confronted me of my worst fears and constantly motivated me to overcome my fears. He reinstated the faith in me and helped me take my first step into rehabilitation and towards a long journey of glory.
A new surge of power and energy filled me and I decided to make full use of this one life. I started off by joining in the family business. A great leap forward for a conservative Marwari family! All through this, my husband served as a pillar of support and in fact I am joining the family business was on his advice. He guided me, mentored me and made me rise like a phoenix. Slowly I was getting accustomed to my husband’s social life which was great. He started taking me to various clubs and places like the rotary club, Jaycee club, Vidharbha industry association, Vidharbha management association and many other such forums. These were an eye opener for me since I could learn a great deal by visiting so many places and meeting so many people. My learning curve was becoming exponential. This exposure to the outside world made me more social and professional.
With my new found enthusiasm and armed with the knowledge of the world, I set out to turn the fortunes of Akash furniture, our family business. Reluctant to start with I gradually started developing interest and started spending more time and energy into it. And slowly the hard work paid off. Akash types of furniture became one of the biggest and most recognized furniture brands from Vidharbha region. With my first success, Akash started fading and got more time and started being more social (for he loved to do that). He was part of various social organization and trade bodies and had an active social life. He was also the president and a trade member body of various organizations and kept him occupied most of the times. But in spite of his busy schedule, he constantly kept on motivating me and guiding me through the difficult times. Slowly I started expanding my horizon and started venturing out into various other interests of mine and other business ventures.
My life got a whole new dimension when I went abroad and had the luck of visiting some amazing countries such as Malaysia, Singapore, and Thailand. These experiences served me a lot and I get to witness first-hand situations of women empowerment. Men and women working shoulder to shoulder and were actually women’s opinions and advice are needed too. Filled with this experience and a broader outlook I applied what I learned in my companies and organizations. The fruits bore and the organization was catapulted into greater heights and I soared with it. I was given various accolades and learned that with great success come great humility. But I take pride in saying I was one of very few lady industrialists and entrepreneur in a whole of central India who is into full-time management and execution of a male dominated and hardcore business of manufacturing, wholesaling and retailing of consumer durables. I felt like I had arrived on the scene with a bang and ready to plunge myself into greater successes in a male dominated society.
Various accolades and recognitions followed such as “the rotary vocational excellence awards” by rotary international sponsored by the Rotary club of Nagpur. It is a very prestigious award given to top achievers in their chosen field of vocation.
But the icing on the cakes was when I got a mail saying I am going to receive an award from Maharashtra CM himself. My joy knew no bounds! The prize “best lady industrialist of the region” was conferred on me and was handed to me by Maharashtra’s honorable ex-CM Prithviraj Chavan. To be honored by such a great person my joy grew leaps and bounds and served as a shot in an arm. I took the positivity and motivation and vowed to work harder and reach places of national and international importance. And the never ending list of prizes grew longer when I was nominated by times of India for Nagpur heroes’ award, which will be given again by honorable CM Shri Devendra Fadnavis. But this prize is for special for it recognizes my achievements across fields such business, promotion of women entrepreneurship, beauty pageants, promotion and guidance for beauty pageants and also for getting selected from Mrs. Universe.
All said and done the journey was never easy for it had its ups and downs. Akash furniture had a new CEO in the form of me. We relocated to a sprawling new office in a multistory building with swanky furniture (pun intended!) and many more people working with us. I personally feel women are better managers since they are naturally good at multitasking, organizing and managing. I started hiring more female professionals and workers, which didn’t go well with the male members. Since most of them were laborers and from the deeply rooted sense of patriarchy, it was difficult for them to take orders from women. Most of the times I had to get work done by the unskilled and unorganized section of people the task proved to be more of a challenge. And to top it when I clinched good deals, false rum ours of sealing deals with various favors of being women was spread.
The shock came in the form of our close relative when he accused me of getting deals signed by offering unethical favors women can offer. Being accused of such propositions and shaming got me on my nerves and I broke down. I decided my time and stint in business has to end now to save me honor and self-respect. Finally, the male dominated society is going to trample a small seed of revolution time and again it shows its ugly head. I cried and cried that day. But then again my guardian, my angel savior, my husband Akash stood behind me like a pillar. He spoke the golden words of when a society has to undergo a sea change it is usually met with excessive rebellion and revolt. People have been too comfortable in her lacuna of lifestyle and to change it completely at a stroke of the pen is quite hard. Do not get bogged down by it. Stand up and face them. Leaders are forged of iron. It is tough situations like this that bring out the best in them. He again stressed the importance of Charles Darwin’s “Theory of survival of the fittest”. It’s a rat race and does not get pulled back by losers.
That again gave me a sense of reassurance and I got back to my old ways of working with a new sense of vigor and extremely matured and the cool head. Today a 12 pass lady is visiting faculty to various MBA, BBA, Engg colleges such IMT Karol, Tirpude College, Lad College& much more & professional organizations like VIA, TIE, VMA etc. which in itself is a great success story.
I take immense satisfaction that amidst all these challenges I take time out for my beauty pageants. The interest started when I was in Nagpur in 2004 when Akash saw an advertisement in a newspaper and motivated me to participate in the Mrs. Nagpur contest! What a life changing decision that was! I not only participated in it, but also went on to win the competition and another Mr. and Mrs. Nagpur with Akash in 2005. That was just the starting to a whole new plethora of activities. I started participating in various new beauty contests and won some of them. I was thoroughly enjoying my phase of life. Then again, as life would have it and for the next 10 years, I got busy with my fast frowning business which demanded my full attention and time. I had to go back to the monotonous, but challenge work atmosphere which was a still a great foundation for me. As luck would have it in September 2015, Akash had heard of Mrs. India worldwide competition as one of her friends is participating in it. But I was reluctant by the commitments I had. But then he had his way and motivated me to participate in it. Initially, my reluctance grew into fear and I was totally scared of it has been 10 years I last participated in such a contest. And also I came to know that majority of the contestant in Mrs. India worldwide were from armed services! They had been nurtured in a defense background and their family background in service bestows them with confidence, poise talent, grace, risk taking since their childhood.
On top, if they were trained for beauty pageants for months from reputed international beauty pageant instituted ilea TARA training institute in Pune. And also many of them were recently married and had previous experiences of pageants like Miss India before the marriage. But guess what! I somehow went on to win the title of Mrs. India worldwide and also the Mrs. Inspiration title.
At Mrs. India worldwide, where I was expected to be a top contender I was facing some ugly truths of life. I had prepared exclusively for it and worked hard on grooming, talent, and other initial rounds. And I was expected to win the crown. But the top prizes were sold out! I came to the witness the ugly side of the beauty contests. But then I again took them into my stride and again tried for Mrs. India globe where I won Mrs. India 1st runner up a title (Indian married woman from all over the globe where the participants). Here to all the judge apprised and poised me for winning the crown, but hey had already sold the top slot to some other person. And all this because of commercial reasons! I took it sportingly as of by now I Have understood that the law of averages works in perfect ways. “You lose some and you win some”. And all this led to my selection in India’s most prestigious beauty contest for married women in the world that sir’s universe which is going to happen in 2016!
Again on the constant motivation of husband and friends, I decided to give it a shot.
This has led to people asking me questions of why I attend so many such contests. The answer is simple for this is what I like to do and it has been my passion for so long. People should follow their passion instead of just running behind my passion. And it’s not just about participating in beauty pageants and it’s also not about winning title, name, and fame. It is much more than that. It gives u that satisfaction that urn following your passion. It is about meeting talented, interesting people, making friend with them, learning from them. It is about the grooming you get, Exposure you get, Confidence you develop & much more. Infect I would like more & more women of tier 2/3 cities like Nagpur to participate in this pageants & show they are equal, if not better than their metro counterpart!!
And With this in mind, I am already guiding/helping/mentoring more than 100 existing & would be participants of Mrs. India / Miss India contest from not only all over India but also from countries like Nigeria, Nepal, use, Europe. I am very happy that more than 25 to 30 of them would be participating in various Mrs. India / Miss India contest in the next few months. I have already made a WhatsApp group of all interested (including Mrs. India, Miss India & other beauty pageants) where I am interacting & sharing my experience, learning, & knowledge with them
Also, this serves as a great learning experience for I get to know information’s about a various place and their traditions and their customs. It also helps to enrich my knowledge. It is a win – win situation for all.
My great passion is dance and my love for it to have grown gradually. Right from my childhood I had been participating in various competitions and won some of them. My attempts at formal dancing couldn’t beat because of my other responsibilities, but I still danced to my heart’s content. I had been dancing in various shows and competitions and one day I got selected after an audition of DID super mom organized by Zee to at Mumbai. Again, it was an emotional moment for me. The dance went for so many rounds and I gradually passed every one of them. But unfortunately, I couldn’t get selected for a final show once too. But I assure you that I will try till I am selected for finals which are shown on Zee to as dance reality dance. Being under the spotlight is sometimes fine. And moreover, I have been at ease in front of the cameras now. Many of my friends even ask to open my own dance academy looking at my dance skills and enthusiasm and also my passion for teaching from dance. My passion for teaching dance has been in prominence during various fellowships and so many other functions where I get to teach the steps to my fellow beings and also help them to better their steps. The part of a rotary club of Nagpur and also during various Sangeet functions during the marriage of dear ones is where I get to wear my dancing shoes! But then opening a dance academy of my own has been a dream and one day will realize they just like my other dreams.
Another important part is my beauty and fitness regime. A woman has to make sure her health stays paramount and also a healthy mind stays in a healthy body. Health is relative to the fitness and fitness is relative to the age. Regardless of age, fitness is really important for a healthy lifestyle. Women, as they age, would lead to iron deficiencies and lack of calcium and ultimately lead to bone and back problems. This is where a balanced and healthy diet is of paramount importance. A healthy woman is imperative because she has to multitask and also take care of her business ventures, her household, her husband and kids and also her in-laws. Beauty is one of the very important essences of womanhood for God has created every woman beautiful, so it is our duty to maintain that virtue.
I follow the fitness routine diligently combining various fitness forms. The greatest rage in the present times is Zumba where it focuses on overall body fitness. Apart from that a healthy mix of cardio, strength workout, gumming and yoga for at least an hour a day. But make sure that UN does it in 4 or 5 days a week since urn body needs enough rest to rejuvenate. A good mix of workout combined with healthy eating is the secret to my beauty and fitness. And I like to mix up my fitness routine as I easily get bored doing the same things it kind of makes it monotonous. Yoga is good for flexibility and meditation is good for peacefulness, gumming I do I t for toning my body and keeping my strength intact, and running and jumping rope for burning my fat. Yes, I do accumulate fat, too! And honestly, if we do this thing diligently you’ll be healthy and free of any disease.
Honestly, I don’t follow any beauty regime. I am blessed to have a natural beauty. And I am thankful to God for that. And because of the active lifestyle and healthy eating habits, I manage to stay young and look fresh. Maybe that’s my secret ingredient. But during various pageant sessions, I look forward to the little bit of grooming and I have to learn a few makeup tips which I follow while going to parties and other social functions. Though it is time-consuming, it’s worth it. I make sure that I remove the makeup before going to bed so as not scare my husband! I personally believe in inner beauty and pity people who take extra initiatives look something which they are not. It’s a biased world and people should judge a person by their character and not by their looks. Better people should accept persons as they are instead of judging them for no one is perfect. And I again insist your internal beauty is more important than external beauty and look for a partner who appreciates your inner beauty and accepts you for what you are.
Although I was born in Kolkata my heart and soul lie in Nagpur, for this is the place which made me what I am and I am forever grateful for it. My first title of Mrs. Nagpur is what drew my love for this orange city. There are several things about which can go on for days. For it is a second tier city it has its own traffic limitations, and the city is very peaceful. Since the distances are short and well-connected I have enough time to dwell upon my talents and had enough time to hone my skills. People always knew each other and it is a small city you always bump into one or the other. It would have been if it was a metro city. Also, people know each other here and are very helpful as everybody have enough time, which again helps women like me who has come to you from difficult times.
Being professional married women I have to give equal justice to my industry and family and also my social obligations. And since all of them have their own preferences and timelines ,it made all the way more difficult. But I took this difficulty in my stride and learned to handle them and keep everyone happy including myself. I would make sure that I don’t miss out little sessions of yoga and some of that ‘me-time’ every day. Also diving and running acted as great stress busters for me. I always look forwards to this day so that I can reconnect with myself and have a dialogue with my inner self and which again proves as a great stress buster. Also, guiding young entrepreneurs makes me stay in touch with the current trends and updates.
The jewel of my eyes, my son Aryan studies in a residential school in Panchami and it was a conscious decision to put him in one. Right from the starting we wanted him to self-sufficient and independent, life lessons which I learned it the hard way. The decision was tough but then it was for his benefit. I always look for his vacation time where I can spend some time with him and we usually go on vacations where we unwind ourselves. I eagerly look for those times.
Managing personal and professional life has been an art and I learned it by the hard way. And that’s a challenge for every working woman all over the world. But then I was lucky to have such an understanding, encouraging and motivating husband, Akash who was sent by God. My son who was in the boarding class derived me of his simple pleasures, but then again gave me ample time to improve myself. But not all was hunky – dory. Problems kept on persisting with my in- laws, but my experiences taught me to keep calm and handle them with panache. They had their concerns towards me.
It has always been a point of pondering for many how I am able to interact with many graduates from it and also MBA students with limited schooling and at the same time manage my business where I have to manage accounts. Actually, I do both internal accounts and also various taxation issues and also handle the Martens of production, sales, marketing, transportation, human resources all by myself and since ours is especially an SME industry where we cannot afford to hire professional for every function of management. There are days when I ask this question to myself. True education plays an important role, but her life is the biggest teacher and I am fortunate enough to learn from the greatest teacher. I was fortunate enough to get into this business at the tender age of 22 and with lots of training, exposure, experience which I got with my 3 years of married life and 2 years of my motherhood experience. It is here where I learned actual practical learning and exposure to the competitive world.
I have learned through all my failures and successes and more through failures. And every day I see it as a leering and every work is a value adding exercise. I learn, unlearn, and relearn.
As for my family, it is a mixed feeling, my husband was my pillar of support, but my in- laws were not that much of great help. But then it’s understandable. He is the one who is ambitious and always insists that he should be known as shiplap’s husband rather than the other way around.
Success is not built on success, but forged in failures. A person who avoids failure also avoids success, for failure is the stepping stone to success. My short history of life is the true testament to that. I had always derived motivation from Abraham Lincoln. Also, Indira Gandhi had been a motivating figure for her role in Bangladesh liberation and several wars with Pakistan. Though I may not agree with her policies still she was assertive.
Finally, I would say that women are the god’s wonderful creation. They are bestowed with beauty and brains. You are born to spread love, provide happiness and empathy. Believe in yourself no matter what and seize the day for it is yours.
Embrace yourself with confidence and fill yourself with pride. Don’t let anyone take control of you.